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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22662199">loose lips sink ships</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dandelionslute/pseuds/dandelionslute'>dandelionslute</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Witcher (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, Drunk!Jaskier, M/M, Men not talking about their feelings, rambling!Jaskier</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 15:34:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>420</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22662199</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dandelionslute/pseuds/dandelionslute</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaskier has too many feelings after drinking ale, and Geralt has little patience with him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>92</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>loose lips sink ships</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“It’s torture, being human. Sometimes I wish I could just turn it off. Turn it all off.”</p><p><em>Alright,</em> Geralt thinks, <em>I’ll bite.</em></p><p>“Why?”</p><p>Jaskier huffs and rolls his eyes dramatically. He picks up his mug of ale with an unsteady hand and drinks. He somehow manages to keep making exasperated sounds as he does. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and sets his beer down; it sloshes in the mug and spills a bit. </p><p>“Why?” He scoffs again and looks around to people sitting beside him who aren’t actually there. “<em>Why, </em>he asks.”</p><p>Geralt sighs. He’s sorry he did ask.</p><p>“I have to feel <em>all </em>of the <em>time</em>, Geralt,” Jaskier groans. “It truly is exhausting.” He drops his head into his hands.</p><p>Geralt says nothing, instead waiting for the bard to continue.</p><p>“For example,” Jaskier starts and looks up quickly, “I feltscared today watching you fight that big, scary rooster lizard thing-”</p><p>“Cockatrice.”</p><p>“A what?”</p><p>“It’s called a Cockatrice, and you’re lucky it didn’t stare you in the eye.”</p><p>“Well that can’t be real,” Jaskier snorts.</p><p>“It is. You were saying?”</p><p>Jaskier’s caught in the middle of a huge gulp of ale and puts his finger up at Geralt to signal <em>wait</em>.</p><p>Geralt rolls his eyes and turns his gaze towards the empty mugs already littered around their table. “Jaskier, I think we should leave.”</p><p>“I’m not going anywhere!” Jaskier proclaims. “For once, please let me get swimmingly drunk, chat up some ladies, and have an evening of blissful <em>un</em>-feeling.”</p><p>“And what else do you feel?”</p><p>“Well.. I feel excited at the prospect of sliding up to that lovely blonde over there,” he gestures towards a woman who is in deep conversation with a man who is very clearly her lover. “I feel sad… I haven’t got many friends I suppose, being a travelling bard and all. I mean I did have one good friend when I was a child, Xavier was his name.. he wasn’t very bright.. nor good at singing.. nor anything really.. I wonder where he ended up. Perhaps we’ll bump into-”</p><p>“Jaskier.”</p><p>“Alright alright. I just feel so many things.. it’s overwhelming. How am I, a very talented but very humble, simple bard, meant to deal with all of this stuff.. and I mean, it doesn’t help that now you’ve come along and I-”</p><p>Jaskier catches himself and blinks, and Geralt waits. Jaskier stammers. He clears his throat, picks up his drink and finishes it. “I think we should leave.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I researched the cockatrice so this was proper lore for you guys</p></blockquote></div></div>
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